The First Step is Admitting It

All change begins with setting priorities

As 2009 ended I prepared to send out my year end email. However, I realized I needed to focus more on sharing than bragging. As 2010 gets going I have a lot to be happy about from what I accomplished last year. I want to kick off my blog this year with the lessons I learned from last year.

Previous to last year I spent my time consumed by work. I had saw three straight relationship end at a point where they were ready to go to the next level, but needed work and commitment to grow. Instead of investing in the relationship, I redirected resources to work. It’s easy to look back now and see what was wrong, but I couldn’t see it then. I was consumed with work. I was so absorbed by it that I couldn’t even put myself as a top priority let along a significant other.

As I entered 2009 I did something I had not done in the previous years. I determined my personal goals with action plans for them and made them my focus. I started with what I needed for me. I needed time to refresh, so I listed 10 days of skiing (I got 23). I needed time to release energy, so I ran races, two in personal best times. I needed to plan more for the future and so I committed to saving more money are researching business school programs. Every personal goal got crossed of at year end, a first for me.

This is easier said than done. I had failed at prioritizing in the past. This time before I would put anything on the calendar for work, I would put my needs on first and let work fit in around it. Amazing concept, huh? In the nine plus years I’ve been working since graduating college, I never took a full week vacation. I made some attempts, took a lot of long weekends, but failed to truly step away from work. Last year I did it twice, once planned out six months in advance to see Oktoberfest in Munich and another way more spontaneously with less than 3 weeks notice to explore Alaska.

The best part about prioritizing was that I was able to spend time searching for someone to love. In typical “Rob form”, I created a process (more on that in a future blog post), and I explored eHarmony. I found an amazing woman and found the true reward of making a commitment to my goals.

I've been asked many times over the past decade to list my priorities and I can honestly say I spent a lot of time lying to myself. When you look at your calendar from week to week; does it reflect your top priorities? If you fail to plan for it, then you fail to make it a priority.